Friday, November 10, 2006

I just blew in from the windy city

The windy city is NOT mighty pretty. Bah.

This week we have been on a steep learning curve. So steep they attached me to the rest of my party with a rope and issued me with crampons (CRampons) so that I could ascend the near vertical ice rock face....that is called "Having a baby with wind".

(Or gas, for the Nth Americans)

Wind. It sounds so innocent. And yet trapped within her little digestive system it can reduce my sweet little Honour into a red-faced, screaming Pterodactyl.

Oh the pathos. Oh the sadness. When her cries reach the Pterodactyl scream it will literally break your heart.

In fact, one evening of much trapped windiness, my chest opened, my heart fell out and smashed intol tiny pieces on the floor. (Tiny pieces including several small springs and a cuckoo).

When you are pretty much spending all your time feeding the little cuteness and yet every feed you can FEEL the bubbles going down inside her...and you KNOW what this means for the next few hours/many hours. It is very demoralising. I have now tried every burping technique known to man. I may have even invented a few. And by all means tell me more of them (swing her upside down by her left leg, stand on your right leg and shout SCRABBBLE at the top of your lungs)....but really nothing seems to eradicate ALL the wind.

EVIL WIND as we like to call it.

I get some classic burps out of her (cause for much celebration) and then 5 seconds's back.
Hence she has hardly been sleeping during the day. The odd 40min nap....

YIKES. I look like I live in the Land of the Living Dead.

But I don't. I live in the Windy City.

And it is NOT mighty pretty.

But let me just say that I am going to track down the inventor of Infacol (wind medicine) and hug him/her to within an inch of his/her life...I got some yesterday and so far it is KICKING Gripe Water's ass.

(If in fact, gripe water has an ass.....)

***P.S by the way we have eradicated my diet as the source of wind production....I have resurrected my BLAND DIET TM and it makes no difference. It seems to be a phase, possibly related to a growth spurt. Also the milk coming out very fast.

***P.P.S if you leave some cheery story about how your niece/nephew/child/pet monkey was like this....and it lasted till they were age 16...I will hunt you down. And I will NOT be dispensing hugs.


Blogger sLeEpY*~*sArAh said...

Kyria went through a very "windy" stage too and we discovered that Infacol is a god-sent! It seriously worked wonders. We'd give her a drop before feeding her and it really helped.
She grew out of the stage. At around 2 months or so, she was good to go.

Now she can burp all on her own. Hope that gives you some hope.
We're now going through the teething stage with our little doll.
LOVING IT (note the strong sarcasm here!) - haven't mastered a trick to make it easier yet, but I feel we're close to break-through

9:13 PM  
Anonymous Stu said...

Oh poor chickens...... we sympathize and empathize with you and any other kind of ....ize that communicates love and support across the miles.

Take courage my valiant friends it will pass..... believe

All our love,

Stu, Lynley & Jordan

12:33 AM  
Blogger Charlie said...

for a second, i thought you were in chicago. poor baby.
i hereby declare Honour an honorary Blue Angel. bless her little stomach.

4:07 AM  
Blogger chirobiro said...

you poor things....... lots of jiggling really is the best thing.

I'm so excited, neede to tell someone. i just wrote an email to stuart Marconi on Radio 2 as i been listening all afternoon while doing my accounts/tax arghhh, and just now, he has read out my email and i am so chuffed! never happened before.

4:58 PM  
Blogger The Fast & the Fabulous said...

Gnash. gnash.
So sorry that such discomfort is happening. I was going to suggest a visit from uncle Charlie, but then realised that Alyn had visited recently, and if he wasn't able to help..... : )
Sending sleep in your direction
love me

2:54 AM  
Blogger s@bd said...

both my babies were gassy little monkeys when they were wee. It passed (pun fully intended) at about 6 weeks / 2 months ...

I found bouncing on my big exercise ball while holding them in my arms was the best solution.

3:00 PM  
Blogger A.J. said...

well if it helps we are praying for the little gassy darling!

Miss you all tons!

10:46 PM  

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