Friday, July 27, 2007

The Best Laid Plans

It seems to be the week for precedents.

In a totally unprecedented move I was packed, totally packed, including hand 9pm on Wednesday. That is nearly 48hours ahead of getting on a plane. As a committed procrastinator and last-minute-bunger-of-stuff-in-bags this was a bit of a shock to the system.

The only problem with being so freakishly organised (I have created an hour by hour spreadsheet of our travels allocating food, nappies, milk and clothes changes at relevant intervals) that it leaves you 48hours in which to think of other things that might be useful to add in.

Hence I have changed my mind three times about which pyjamas to put Honour in (cool ones - planes are overheated when you get on, no, the warm ones because they get really cold, no, the cool ones because we are going into summer in the Uk....etc etc).

Overthinking things? Moi. Just a tad.

Anyway, today is D-Day. So, clearly, things are going to start going a bit weird. Honour just refused to go down for her nap. REFUSED. This is the first time this has ever happened - she has never refused her morning nap before. NEV-UR.

So my minute-by-control freak-minute plan went out la fenetre! It was 11am and I wasn't even dressed!

I think she is cutting a tooth at the moment and it is driving her beserk. Sigh. Any chance it will break through the gum before we get on the plane???

And just because I am so bizarrely prepared ('ha ha' says the Universe) having cleaned out the entire house already this week, I have even updated my mac website with some photos of Honour. Go to Photos 7 - In Da Hood.

Speak to you "from the other side".

Sunday, July 22, 2007

When the thing that you've been trying to avoid at all costs, is the very thing that happens


For those of you who've been buried at the bottom of the sea (with Davy Jones, his locker, and those weird transparent globular creatures with lightbulbs dangling off their foreheads) for the past few months, let me just remind you that we are flying to the UK in FIVE DAYS TIME.

(Can you hear the panic, people?)

Actually, come to think of it, I don't know if I've even mentioned it very much on the blog - but perhaps we have become like an old married couple. You know, where I think I've told you about it because it's been my preoccupation of every waking moment for the last 5 months...but actually I haven't. So, um (shuffle feet, awkward ear tugs) yeah, we are flying to the UK in FIVE DAYS.

And for those of you who really are lurking at the bottom of the ocean waiting for some huge whale carcass to float down so you can feed on its remains (hey, this isn't really a flattering image is it?) let me just remind you that we live in New Zealand. Which is like a billion miles from everywhere. YES. A billion. Don't argue with me.

Ok, before I get any more passive aggressive on you (for no good reason) let me move on from the ocean imagery. (You can blame David Attenborough and 'Planet Earth' for that).

So yes, the thing that you REALLY want to avoid when about to spend 24hours on a plane with a ten month blocked ears. Hence when we flew down to Wellington (a piddling hour long flight) we were dosing her up with decongestants like they were going out of fashion. (Which by the way, they seriously ARE. I mean, when was the last time you saw Heidi Klum use Vicks Vaporub? Actually, don't answer that.)

So, um, on Monday last week when Honour turned scarlet I took her to the doctors. And yes, you guessed it, she has an ear infection. No, I lie. Two ear infections (one in each ear, keep up!). Two REALLY bad ear infections resulting in a temperature of 38.9. Which is .1 off brain boiling. Antibiotics were prescribed and a check up in 6 weeks by which time her ears should have cleared.

I pointed out that we were flying in, um, 2 weeks time and asked, ahem, would her ears be ok by then. That's when the doc started giving me a peptalk about her eardrums exploding on the plane. About how it would be GOOD if they burst because all the mucus and blood and stuff would come out and she would feel better. Yahuh. Better AFTER her EARDRUMS EXPLODED ON A PLANE.

Anyway, after a minor freak-out, I have decided this is NOT going to happen. And since I have DECIDED. That is what will be. Amen.

So, to cut a long story short... she is fine! The antibiotics have all been guzzled down. Her temp is fine and she seems fine and dandy in herself. In theory her ears still have fluid in them which in theory could hurt when the plane goes up and down. But I have DECIDED that she is going to be fine. Ok?

Also, I will have lots of painkiller on board with me.

Meanwhile in exciting mucusoid 2 week old cold is still fighting fit, my ear is bunged up too and the pressure in my head was so intense my eyeball went bloodshot! Excellent. Then I got a 24 hour stomach flu with attendant fever and shakes. Then Dave got it. Whoopeee doodee.

The good thing is that all this is happening now before we get on the plane. Hopefully we'll all be fit and well by Friday.

Oh, and Honour started to crawl for real on Saturday! Very cute.

(Also just in time to be strapped to a seat for 13 hours at a time on a plane.)

(Did I mention the planes?)


Tuesday, July 10, 2007

I'm so excited

Well, actually it's Honour who is very excited - at Daddy coming home!

Two new videos for your perusal.

Saturday, July 07, 2007

Let's hope she takes after her father in this department

It's come time to confess.

I've toyed with the idea of letting the cat out of the bag about this, many times before. But somehow lost my nerve.

But now, I can't carry the secret any more - it's too heavy.

It''s.....(gulp)'s that I've been wantonly inflicting my musical taste on my wee, defenceless, earmuff-less daughter.

Now when I say 'taste' I could be stretching a point, well according to Dave 'you just changed key mid-song' Richards anyway.

(Of course my full name is Adele 'yeah, well what IS a key, anyway?' Richards.)

Now one of the main issues (according to Dave "Smirk, you've just changed key three times" Richards) is my quite outstanding ability to listen to the same album, over and over again.

For an example, when I bought my car in November 2005 I placed several CDs in the CD player.

(Well, actually I didn't know I had a CD player till my parents visited in February 06 and my Dad found it under my front passenger seat. So I guess it wasn't until Feb 06 that I put my Cds in there.)

The CDs were a fine choice I think you will agree - Coldplay (excellent start), James Blunt (not bad) and, um, The Footie Anthems Album.

In its defence, The Footie Anthems Album has one of the best songs known to man on it - 'Vindaloo' with classic lyrics like:

'May I introduce you please, to a lump of Cheddar Cheese, knit one, perl one'
'Me and me mum and me dad and me gran are off to Waterloo, me and me mum and me dad and me gran with a bucket of Vindaloo"

Anyway, Alyn & AJ came to visit us in March 06 and were transported about in my car to these aural delights.

They came again in November 06 (that's 8 months later) and the same albums were in my car.

THAT's how long I can listen to the same albums over and over again.

So, as this should be a full confession, I think I should now list the main musical influences that I have subjected Honour to, both in utero and ex utero.

1) Coldplay (X and Y and A Rush of Blood to the Head - over and over and over and over and over and over....)

2) Bruce Springsteen (BOOORRRNNNNN in the USA, I was BOOOOORRRNNN in the USA)

3) Footie Anthems (We're going to score one more than youuuuuu)

4) Laura Woodley (I need a hug on the inside)

5) The Black Eyed Peas (my humps, my humps, my lovely lady lumps)

6) Russell Watson (AMore MUUUSSSica)

7) Apostolic Prayers (harp and bowl)

8) Gwen Stefani (hoo-hoooo, hooo, hooooo)

9) Maroon 5 (and it really makes me wonder)

10) Baby Einstein - Mozart (twinkle, twinkle, twiddly, twiddly)

'Eclectic' doesn't even begin to describe this train wreck of a selection, I know, I know.

In my defence, her main influence has been Coldplay.....AND I didn't get out my Spice Girls album.

You may now ascribe my punishment, report me to child services, suggest an alternative list of influences, or just lie down on the floor and weep.

(I won't notice, I'll be leaping around the lounge to Don't Phunk with my Heart)

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Because what Cathy wants, Cathy gets.

And let that be a lesson to you, children.

The great and the beautiful Chatty Harris requested video, and video she shall have.

This time the epics feature:

1) Honour eating raisins


2) Honour sitting herself up...and blowing raspberries.

Bet you can hardly wait.....

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

I worship the ground she doesn't walk on

Before I had Honour I had basically no clue about babies or children. I was the dimwit who would look at a baby and cooo, "How old?" thinking to myself - 'she's about 6 months old'.

Then the reply would come: "She's 6, goes to school and bakes better gingerbread than you, you child-ignorant freak"

Clueless. Sans clue. Couldn't BUY a clue.

It's therefore somewhat weird to discover that I have become a new breed of freakoid who looks at a 6 month old baby and is AMAZED to see that child use a pincer grip to pick up a raisin. Or, "Wow," I'll gasp, "he LOOKS TO SEE where dropped toys have gone! That's incredible!"

Aaah, the tiny, tiny things that become truly fascinating. And of course when it's YOUR child, it's even more exciting when they do something new. And let me clarify that for you, when I say exciting I'm talking: 'Einstein discovering the theory of relativity' exciting, 'Newton-the apple-and-gravity' exciting, 'that bloke in the bath and Eureka' exciting.

I think the freaky thing is that you spend, what?, about 12 hours a day constantly in the company of this wee person and they do the same things over and over again....drooling, rolling about, giggling, trying to sit up. (I'm talking about Honour, not Dave - just to clarify)

And then one day, with no warning they stand up, dress themselves, and fix themselves an espresso.

Or, in Honour's case just suddenly works out how to get herself into the sitting position from any other. Previously she could sit up if I sat her up, but once she rolled over onto her front or back she couldn't get back up again. Hence I would spend a lot of my day responding to her whingeing and sitting her back up again.

But yesterday morning she worked out how to push herself up. Within seconds she was pivoting all over the room and pushing herself back up to sitting, pivoting, rolling, commando crawling then bouncing back up again. It was truly amazing the speed with which she had entirely changed the way she moves.

And then (lest the excitement kill you) she pulled herself up on the edge of the lounge chair. With no help she pulled herself up and stood there - looking as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

My baby, who only seconds ago (it seems) could hardly hold her head up herself...just stood up.

And that's why I'm going to purchase a unicycle and leave it casually lying around.

Cos you never know, one day she might just hop up on it and do a turn around the room.

What? It could happen.